Nobody wins

I don’t understand why people argue so much. I understand, “different realities, different views and opinions,” but when they become so focused on wanting to be right, they miss the point entirely.arguments

With all the information available today, it’s almost impossible to read each and every claim that comes out about an issue. Global warming for example: There are actually people who believe that we, as a whole, do not have a problem when it comes to the way we treat Earth.  These people insist that the glaciers are not melting (in a recent article, scientists actually say the ice caps are coming back, but I don’t live in Antarctica so I don’t know for sure) and that pollution is not affecting the Ozone layer that we desperately need to survive. But even if the ice caps aren’t disappearing, how can people say our beloved Earth is not becoming damaged by all the carbon being released into the air? We need to accept responsibility and do something about it, before there’s no Earth left to protect. (I know, I sound like a Public Service Announcement.)

The people who don’t believe we have a serious environmental problem are the same people who believe that their religion is the one true religion, and if you don’t believe in their religion you should be burned at the stake. (Really. There are people who post stuff like that on Facebook.)

They believe that all politicians are evil, except for the one they have latched onto, the savior, that one God-like person who is sure to bring the nation out of chaos. (I actually know a few people who believe this.)

These people believe that vaccinations are the cause for their child’s autism (I’m not saying they’re wrong; I’m just saying they aren’t looking at all the facts. I have a son who is autistic, and it never occurred to me it could be the vaccination, not when he has three older sisters who aren’t autistic.)

People tell me, “Don’t eat that; it’ll kill ya,” as I eat my potato chips and drink my diet soda. (Hey, I like fruit, too. Just not while I’m watching TV and surfing the internet) They also say that too much or too little coffee and wine is bad for you.

And please don’t get me started on the health care system in this country. (Spoiler Alert: It’s not all the President’s fault.)

We rely on health care to stay alive, but they charge so frickin’ much every time we go to the doctor,  we end up dying bankrupt anyway. Does anyone ever win?  After all is said and done, we all die anyway. No matter what we do, or how healthy we eat, or what religion we practice, or even who we vote for, no one lives forever. Will it matter then who was right and who was wrong?

So I got off topic a bit, but the reality is, some people just like to argue. It’s a game to them, as though they get points for maliciously putting down anyone who goes against them. (I was bullied when I was a little girl by someone who told me she would beat me up if I wasn’t her friend. Same principle. I wonder where she is now … just kidding, I don’t care.)

But really, it takes too much energy for me to try to persuade someone to see things differently when they refuse to even listen to another perspective. They automatically become defensive and develop tunnel vision, and all they see is what they believe. These people are so good at twisting the truth, they end up winning the conversation purely by default. Everyone gets tired of listening to them and walk away.

I learned a long time ago that sometimes saying nothing is your best bet, especially if you don’t want to get sucked into a meaningless argument where nobody wins. If you’re smart, you’ll seek out others who know how to have a knowledge conversation where you can share ideas, instead one where there’s a lot of yelling and accusing, but little benefit.

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